So this year for Lent, I’m giving up candy, cookies and cake.
I had a suspicion I was eating a lot more of all three things than I realized, and judging by the way my pants have been fitting I need to stop.
Only three days into Lent, and I hear the inner negotiations. Cinnamon rolls aren’t cake, or cookies, so they are okay. Ditto yesterday’s hot fudge sundae. Toast slathered with strawberry jam isn’t cake or cookie, so it’s okay. Today’s thought: Amish Friend Bread, coated with glaze and beefed up with oatmeal, isn’t cake, it’s bread. So it’s okay.
What this tells me: I like sweets and I have trouble saying no to them.
The subtext, and what I think I should be getting out of this exercise: I am wretched at self-denial.
How many other things do I do that with? I am watching my spending so I have more to give our church…except for the $6 dress at Target. And the lunch I forgot to pack so I had to buy in the City ($9). It adds up. Just like all the sweet stuff.
So I see this is going to be a journey, like it always seems to be with me. I’m clearly not a fast learner in the spiritual realm. I have to ingest slowly. Process a bit. I’m going to work on being more aware, and progress to more control. I could use some generalized application in that area too – my words, my thoughts…I need to be aware.
So as I work to control my rampant sweet tooth, I’m hoping the ability transfers to a whole lot of other things. Not because I’m on a diet (although that wouldn’t go amiss) or because I’m worried about my health (I’m not really) but because I need to be more purposeful in my decisions and my choices. Catching myself red-handed negotiating over sweets is a good start.